Getting back to a new ‘normal’ life:
After fifty four days of Food drive during the lock down, I’ve realized, we are here for the long haul. Better get back to the ‘new normal’ life. What is ‘new normal’? Well, our lives, actually. I’m glad people are getting married, (since deaths are taking place anyway! Births are happening too, so why not marriages?) you and I need to get back to our lives, and build ourselves from here onwards. How can we do it? I’ll give you tips on how to get rid of the past and how to get onto our future life.
What do I need most in my life right now?
So, ask yourself this question. I felt I’ve got to have a talk with myself. Remember, I have this habit of self-talk, you can check here and here. In fact, this aitekaaf during Ramzan is also something like that. In this you talk mainly to Allah. Also, see where your life is going so far, and where it needs to go now onwards. Yes, in aitekaaf you acknowledge Allah and His greatness. So, in fact that is what makes you hopeful about your own future too. When you nurture that deep connection with the Maker of this Universe, then you can look forward to a great future for yourself too – with His blessings.
In order to get on with our future, we need to first say goodbye to the past:
Good bye past:
In order to move forward, first get rid of all the baggage which you won’t need. (Why carry all your luggage of the past life?)
It is best to travel light.
Only then you can move far and achieve your goals. How to do it? Lets take a leaf out of Marie Kondo style of decluttering your home. We will do the same with decluttering our minds and ourselves while shedding our past !
Good bye past, Marie Kondo style:
Our past memories are like our possessions in the house. You need to do periodic check ups to get rid of stuff that is no longer useful. For this exercise, I’ll use Marie Kondo method. She doesn’t keep anything that doesn’t give joy. We can do the same for our memories and our past.
Keep good and joyful memories, and throw out the bad ones.
Dealing with bad memories:
I recently watched a beautiful video by Dr. Muwadat Rana, he is the top most psychiatrist in Pakistan today. The video is, ‘What to do when there is nothing to do.’ In it he says that the tough parts in our past were instrumental in making us who we are today. So, we need to honor those ‘bad’ parts in our past also. Many of those ‘bad guys’ taught us important lessons which will be very useful for us in our future. So, let us make a folder in our minds for ‘lessons learnt through bad times and bad guys.’
We thank them formally in our minds.
After this we are ready to find peace in letting go. Not letting go in anger. Instead, letting go with peace. Saying ‘peace be upon you’ to the person and the memories attached to the person who left us, or who was nasty with us.
Goodbye to those who gave us pain:
Let’s do it now. Let us start with those who gave us pain too. Bearing each pain, made me stronger in the end. I’m so grateful to all those who made me feel angry during the worst time of my life. That anger helped me stay alert and strong. A time when otherwise, I would have been broken and shattered. I stood tall and strong, only because of the anger at the injustice.
Thank you, my dear enemy. May Allah bless you for it. (- But don’t you dare try it again!)
Come to think of it, many of my enemies helped me in a way that my friends wouldn’t have been able to! 😉
Embrace happy memories:
I embrace and treasure my happy memories. All my friends, as well as total strangers who reached out and helped me stand tall and strong. (I’m not taking any names for fear of forgetting someone. You know who you are, I do too, as I pray for you in my daily prayers.)
So, we are going to hold on to the beautiful memories. Then, we have to move on. The lesson learnt here is to do the same good deed for others now. (It would be sadqa-e-jaria for them too!)
Strangers helped me, in the same way now we are helping strangers.
My Food Drive is only possible due to your donations. Many of you are total strangers to me, then we go out and help other total strangers too. But wait a minute – we all are humans and by that token we are not strangers. We are creatures of same God. One humanity. One race. So, that is why it feels wonderful to be helping another person.
Now, that you’ve filed all your good memories, and sorted out all the ‘bad’ ones, by being at peace with them. We are now ready for our future.
Lets become our best self today.
Be mindful of all that is done in the day, week and months.
Special Physical care:
Sleep well. Wake up full of energy, making healthy options. Eat with care for your health, not your obsessions. During Ramzan the sleep routine is a mess. But still one needs to make sure one manages to get eight hours of sleep in twenty four hours – getting six hours straight – yes, you can do it! Don’t tell me you are going to miss out on your health for Instagram???
Dress well: even during lock down. In fact, dress up specially for your husband. (Remember he is used to all those razzle dazzle colleagues at his office normally. Those girls have homes and family too. Still they dress well to be in office. Why can’t you dress well at home? Put on accessories, be drop dead gorgeous, even if your husband pretends he hasn’t noticed. He does. Believe me, he does.
Fitness routine: Exercise, and diet both needs a routine. Make a weekly routine and follow it.
books, music, habits, routine,
Make your bucket list:
A bucket list is about all the things you want to do before you die. I’m sharing mine here, you need not cheat! Hurry and make your own. You can get an idea from mine:
- Visit Norway, and see the Northern lights.
- New Zealand.
- South Africa.
- Calgary, Seattle and Halifax too, of course!
- Have my own YouTube channel.
- Publishing Message from the East, by Allama Iqbal.
- Completing and publishing my book on Time Management.
- Making a documentary or writing a book on Gems of Pakistan.
- Book of my blog posts.
- My Life My Stories, part II.
- Have more books of mine on Amazon books.
- Establish formally: Shireen’s Studio spiritual and art works.
So, how do you want to welcome your future?
Meanwhile, stay blessed and protected! 😊
Note: All photographs of paintings by author. All except on painting are by author and artist ;). Last photograph is of painting by Mashkoor Raza, which is owned by author.
Love love love this. Thank you for sharing Aunty. This article is written not merely with a pen but with your blood sweat and tears. That’s bcz u shared so much of your life experiences and your lessons from those experiences. I thank God I read this today. I shall keep coming back to it bcz we all need that positive pill in Life ; don’t we?!
And I shall cheat a little in copying from your bucket list !!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
Hey! I’m so glad you liked it. Yes, you are right, it is written with my blood, sweat and tears. I’m so glad the words made a difference for you. Feel so much indebted to so many great writers, who have changed my own life! It makes a big difference.
Do, keep coming back, and you can suggest topics for me to write on, too.
Now, I’m wondering which ones you are cheating from my bucket list?!
Stay blessed and protected.
Impressive !Very well written , full of motivation and positive energy.
Thank you so much! Really need my Reader’s feedback. It spurs me on to do more writings for you. 🙂
You’re my inspiration
I totally love your article “goodbye past and welcome future”
It truly gives me hope and courage to fight with the past flashbacks
You’re doing great work
You’re gem of a person
Keep it up 🌸🌸🌸🌸
Thank you so much! I needed that. 🙂
You have kinda made my day with your words….
Thanks for spreading positivity. Please let the creation of your youtube channel on number one in your bucket list. That way, we’ll be able to watch together with our family. Do post more often. Regards
Team OrdinaryPakistaniBoy /youtube
Thank you so much for your encouragement. Lets hope I can resist all the tempting distractions of my life to accomplish this. Your words have certainly motivated me.