Food for thought My Life

Raise the level of your life!

Hi Everyone!

Sigh… I know life these days is tough. I get so many of your messages crying for help. Thank God, I’m not God. Can you imagine how many calls for help He receives? Well, He is God. I’m definitely not. So, here is a combined response to all of you who are reaching out to me.

My dear Janus,

Yes, life is bad. I’ve got news, there will be more bad news too; on the other hand, not necessarily! Just hurry up and make a list of all the good things you are enjoying these days. In spite of everything. That will make you happy.

Take a hold of yourself.

I’ve noticed something about God – I’ve known Him longer than most of you – He watches you closely, (He is also watching others around you, having it so much worse.) Then He hears you weeping and wailing about your ‘tragedies’. That’s why He gives a bigger blow, to make you realize how much better off you are. Then, (after the blow) you look back at that same ‘tragic’ time as the ‘best times of your life!’ Yes, that time, when you were too busy saying how tough life is.

Now, this is tough.

That wasn’t!

So, that’s how life happens.

Didn’t we experience it recently?

I’m telling you, watch the media in January 2020 and that of November and December 2019. Constant noise about ‘this problem and that problem.’ So, it is like Allah said, ‘I gave you the best planet in the constellation, what did you do with it? Then you are saying how bad it is!

Anyhow, He found it was the same with everything else.

Look at this beautiful earth and lovely rainbows, that continue to enchant us…

Picture taken by member of Shireen’s Studio

God had enough:

Yes, it isn’t the first time He has done this clean sweeping. We found many examples in the past; (I believe He has done it every hundred years or so. Last one was Spanish ‘flu, 1918.)

So, sometimes we humans need that huge blow from Him.

Just to get back to our senses.

God gave us Covid19:

We certainly need to learn some lessons fast. He is the Boss. He is Nature. When nature is treated so ruthlessly time and again, then we have to face the consequences. Standing by, and wondering what happened, won’t work, as it has never worked in the past.

Allah says:

‘Allah will never change the grace which he has bestowed on a people until they change what is in their (own) souls: and verily Allah is He Who hears and knows (all things.) – Surah Anfal (8), Ayat 53.

Let us get to work:

Here is what we can do:

1.      Realize, ask forgiveness, start rectifying.

If we don’t know, where we went wrong, how can we improve ourselves? So, point wise, let us look back and realize them. I know it is tough, when we have made so many mistakes. But we have to start somewhere. So, after realizing, then we have to get to work. One by one to rectify each mistake we have been doing.

2.      Stop wastage of time:

Procrastination. Lack of direction. Overspending of time on useless things. Ignoring those around us who are in pain, and focusing on pointless things. This is why such time spending doesn’t give us peace and serenity.

A simple test of a time well spent is the pleasure you get out of it. All nights, wasted chatting with strangers, who will only walk out on you, in spite of all the ‘promises’. So, why waste your time on these nincompoops?

3.      Do not interfere:

How we try to ‘control’ others! Instead of controlling our own selves, we try to dictate to our spouse, children, colleagues, subordinates and others. When something goes wrong, blaming others. Yes, we are experts at the blame game. We need to focus on ourselves instead. Diary writing is the best way to get close to realizing your own mistakes, or to boost up your own morale.

4.      Disregard of Nature and its laws:

Plants, rainwater, garbage, earth surface, minerals, water, vegetations and a complete disregard for proper disposal of garbage by literally flinging your own garbage out on the road while driving.

(If you want to fling something out, keep those seeds of mangoes and other fruits, just fling those out on the green patches, who knows, they might take root!

5.      Not following Government laws:

Isn’t it interesting, that as an opposition leader and political leader, same Imran Khan tore up the gas bills in public, but when he came into power, the same gas bills and electrical bills became even more outrageous? Yes, it is because, it is easy to criticize the Govt, till you yourself become the government and get to see the handicaps with which they have to run the country.

I’m glad Imran Khan did one thing about reducing the debt from loans of the country.

The point is: whatever the government laws are, adhere to them. Stop at the red signal on roads, pay the income tax, (yes, June 30th is round the corner. In these Corona times, adhere to every rule possible. Pay all bills in time.

6. Environmental care :

Do not waste electricity, gas, water or rainwater. Same goes for all natural resources of oil, coal, gas or minerals. At the individual level we have to be more responsible.

7. Stay within your locus of control:

Looking outside our locus of control and influence and spending all the time on is literally a crime; because it comes at the cost of your locus of control. That the time you could have spent improving your own life, and that of those in your family and community, you spend on thinking of how others should improve themselves!

Do look up about it, and you will find out more. Yes, Google it: Locus of Control.

My situation right now:

Daughter’s wedding next week:

Here I am lecturing you about what to do and what not to do. You have no idea of my own situation right now.

Can you believe it, my youngest daughter is getting married next week? Insha Allah. We knew this girls’ wedding would be the most unique.

Thanks to Corona, it sure is unique;

Believe me, the relief is amazing, Corona has taken most of the tension out of our event; Only inviting four persons to accompany the ‘barat’, and we shall also have only four persons to receive them! At a time when Corona is at its peak in Pakistan, (almost 190,000 cases, and 3900 deaths so far.) We are going ahead with the event. It is Ruksati after the nikah ceremony which was held in February this year, here.

The date was a month ahead, but since no one else can come from abroad, I found no point in waiting. Alhamdolillah, Faizan’s mother agreed too.

Apartment hunt:

So, Faizan and Waliya started hunting for their apartment and finally the 36th one was the ONE. So, then I got to work with my girl. I thought we had saved up so much due to not having a formal function, now, we could help decorate their apartment, and get some useful stuff for the couple, instead.

Thanks to my ‘bridal projects’, the shop keepers are only a call away. Just before the ‘lock down’ of different sectors, I was able to shop for my daughter.

So, an exciting process began which was accomplished almost entirely on the phone, as I have an amazing team for furniture, curtains, upholstery and polishing of furniture etc. In no time, everything was done. When my team works, they WORK!

You know, I was clear about not getting upset about anything. I’ve known of friends getting ill, and one of them even got a stroke due to the ‘shadi shopping.’ I was very clear about not letting this get to me. It just isn’t worth it.

Burning issue:

Suddenly, on 15th June, 2020 I spilt tea on my right side of waist, stomach and upper leg. Painful second-degree burns soon developed into huge blisters, all the way from upper waist till upper leg, about five inches wide at my thigh. Now, most of it is healing well, but a part of it is not. I’m having to get four dressings a day; and antibiotics.

Well, at least it isn’t Corona! Alhamdulillah.

So, here I am typing away, at almost ten pm feeling like a zombie due to the medications. But thank God, I finally asked Dr. Mehmood to come to see the wound, which is now on terra firma after he has taken control of my problem. Remember, he is our family doctor, a Medical Specialist and Gastroentrologist.

Our birthday together:

Waliya and I have our birthday on same date. So, of course that was fun. I wasn’t able to have my usual birthday bash, calling all my friends, like in the past, here. Insha Allah next year.

A memorable birthday three years ago, at my Shireen’s Studio.

Meanwhile Faizan and their friends gave Waliya a surprise in their apartment, when she went to do it up a couple of days ago.

Then we have our birthday at home too.

Need prayers for next week:

While all this time we continued with the Food drives and even married off a few brides. So we have achieved 33 bridal projects. Now, 34th one is all set. I’m still hoping for that parcel from Canada issue to get solved….

Muzammil on left and Ahmed the driver, both have become pros at their work.

Ruksati event next week:

Better end now, Love you all for your patience. It shall talking more about wedding plans next week, IA. Please pray it goes well. It isn’t easy seeing off one’s precious daughter. Naturally, we shall be missing my daughters, Nataliya and Nadiya and my sons in law, Ahmed Bilal and Haaris. We shall be missing my husband Air Cdre M Najib Khan and my father Brig. M M Sarfaraz Khan. They will be in our hearts.

Thanks to Corona, event simplified:

Frankly, my daughter and I are very happy with it all.


Stay blessed and protected my dear Reader

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  1. Amna says:

    Thank you for saying such amazing things,Shireen Apa.Everytime I go through any of your blogs,there is always a feeling that it’s all that I needed to hear and realize.You never fail to surprise me with your amazingness.These blogs are truly a treasure house of wisdom.Not everyone is generous enough to share their experiences and the precious insights they get out of them,but you’ve done it in a superb way.Inspite of all its ugliness,this world will still remain beautiful with angelic people like you on it.Lots of prayers for your speedy recovery.Keep brightening our world with your beautiful words❤

    1. Shireen Gheba Najib says:

      My dear Amna,
      Loved your comment! Taking the trouble to write all these points means the world to me. Thank you so much. 🙂 Stay blessed and protected.

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