Hope you all are well, alive and kicking. Well, I’m that too, but as you know, my black cocker spaniel Pepper is lost, and I’m very sad. Honestly, he would keep me so much company and give me so much love. Such a sweet personality. My only hope is that he is alive and well. That one day soon, he will be returned to me. Meanwhile, I’ve got to deal with my sadness.
I’ve taken so much sadness lately, losing my dad last year was tough enough. We get to lose so many people and things in our lives, some we can share with others, some we can’t. We just have to manage without them in our lives. Somehow!
We have to learn to cope, by getting busy with other activities.
Finding an activity:
As you’ve seen in my post about it, my Formula for happiness here, through these, I get involved in trying to bring happiness to someone else, in my life. If my family are already fine, then I look for someone outside my family to make happy in some way. I know, their happiness will make me happy too. Guaranteed.
Giving food and helping with marriages has also continued, thanks to you all. So all is good in this department.
Finding a good activity like gardening is usually good; But that is out, these days, with so much rain. So, the other activity is to be watching movies. Please watch something pleasant. These days I’ve found a very nice series on Netflix called Chesapeak Shores, it is really nice. God bless my SIL Haaris who has shared his membership of Netflix with me. So, every night when Mum goes to her room, I watch my favorite programs.
Last evening, i watched this movie, Love Guaranteed. It was beautiful, and just the kind of movie I love to watch.
Going for drives:
This is one of my most favorite activities. Here, it is a choice to go alone or take along someone. I’m careful with whom I pick as she must be someone who leaves her worries behind. Many people have a bad habit of taking along all their worries too! I mean, for God’s sake, why are we going for this drive? So, kindly LEAVE IT BEHIND. Just put on some lovely music, and go to some beautiful place. Living in Islamabad there are plenty. Well, I’ve lived all over Pakistan. There are many beautiful places in every city. You need the eye for it. Pick your favorite places and go for one of them.
I’ve now brought my exercise bike to the lounge. So, I watch a half hour episode while using the bicycle. (Yes, Friends is a good choice too!) That feels great. I remember to keep my phone on me, so that it is counting the ‘steps’ too. I’m trying to increase my ‘steps per day.’ Using weights and exercising while watching a program on television is also a good idea.
No comfort eating:
The other day, the Indian health expert Luke C came live just to talk about why comfort eating is bad. When you are stressed out and eat, then it has the opposite affect on our body. So, being conscious about that is important. I’ve already put on too much weight. So, now I’ll have fruit only. (Ahem! I did a lot of that with mangoes, all summer!) So, now find some other fruits to have during those comfort eating bouts.
At least eat wise.
This is an all time favorite sadness activity. That is because it keeps your hands and head both busy. The heart too feels great after a while. Naturally, you will try to share what you’ve made with others. So, it can be so much fun, the cooking and the sharing of the food part.
Of course I love painting, writing, reading, travel, and a good conversation on the phone with a good friend. Well, I know my mother did a lot of embroidery and knitting when she was younger. She was absolutely amazing at both. So, hobbies make you busy, and there is a good end product to show for it too.
Feels good all the way! 😊
Do it in real, or go to their place (with social distancing,) or have a video chat. You can even do a live Instagram session with one if you are up to it. Somehow it works up quite a lot of dopamine.
This has always been an all time favorite of most women. I love going to get some necessary items, and specially some gifts for my loved ones, and also get a few for myself, for a change!
Finally, the most powerful means of self therapy is praying, and having a straight (man-to-God-talk), using any language you like, (He understands the plea of the heart.) Nothing works like this one. Of course, chanting certain names of Allah, or reading Verses and Prayers from Holy Quran, here, works. Doing this first thing in the morning – to give you a good kick-start to the day – is best.
Coax yourself to do it:
When you are sad, of course you don’t feel like doing anything. You have to coax yourself to do it, or put yourself in a position that you will have to do it. As they say in Urdu, himmat to karni parti hai – you have to make an effort. Yes, you have to get up and get going.
Do these five things first:
- Get up from bed, and make the bed nicely.
- Read some nice duas or watch a youtube motivational video.
- Listen to your favorite song while doing nothing else. Then keep some lovely back ground music.
- Take a shower, and dress up drop dead gorgeous, and put on full make up (last one only if you are a girl!) Don’t forget to put on perfume.
- Have a lovely breakfast.
Stay blessed and protected…. And please pray for my Pepper to come back miraculously. 😊