Salaams, Everyone!
Peace and blessings be upon you. Together we are living through a new world. I’m loving this silence, this peace and this giving our time and thoughts to others.
What with all this Corona business, and now its Ramzan – the month of fasting. Alhamdolillah!
Situation these days:
Believe me, at a time when everyone is talking about ‘boredom’ and ‘how to kill time,’ here I am not having a minute to myself. The ninety-two donations I’ve received so far since March 22nd, 2020 have kept me on my toes. So, I’m thanking Allah for this involvement in something that will definitely ease the hardships of hundreds of persons in this region.
I think the worst thing these days is the feeling of not being able to do anything or make a difference. You all have given me the answer to both these questions. Together, we have become able to do something and make a difference. All thanks to your trust and love. Thank you so much. ?
Ramzan:
Corona has made Ramzan easier for us all. Yet, I’ll really miss all the plates of goodies that we used to share with everyone in our community. My daughter Waliya and I are receiving PR packages. I truly believe it is important to promote business and entrepreneurs, specially at this time. So, some of the business can carry on.
The Dilemma this Ramzan:
Last Ramzan, we saw Iftaris being given and distributed on roadsides and every mosque. This year mosques won’t give food. Only because it isn’t possible in normal size mosques. How will the poor man and jobless persons open their fasts? So, I’m planning to give them about an hour earlier on roadsides, as I normally give food. By now all those who regularly receive from us know, and already sit apart from each other. We drive over and hand over the food. Lets hope it works out.
Food and Rations:
Rations of food packages for one family is being given, it is enough for several weeks. Though government is doing their bit, do keep an eye for anyone we can help. These are people who somehow slip between all systems.
Ramzan and I:
Annual Self appraisal:
Once a year, I need this overhauling which deals with my soul. A time to give an annual appraisal of myself. To be able to talk to my Allah, and thank Him for all the blessings He has been showering on me, in spite of many short comings. How many times I fail! Specially, forgetting my ‘toba’! Let us find workable ways to improve ourselves.
Physical reconstruction:
Every year during Ramzan my hope to lose weight blooms, but due to the goodies, I bloom more! ? The diet part get out of hand; I love parathas, dahi baras and pakoras. How can I improve this? … God knows!
So a lovely live session by Marrium on her Instagram last night about fitness and her own success in reducing weight, made me hopeful again. I’d recommend her Instagram account @usernameconfidential. Do check it out.
Yes, the same one where she had asked me to come on live. I’ve watched her other sessions. Mine was actually the worst- visually. But content-wise, I received an excellent response from you all. (You are such darlings!) Though, she was so sweet about. (Yes, everything went hotch potch that time.) the sound and visuals, then due to the ear phones I couldn’t put the mobile on its’ stand. So, coming back to my topic, we all need more self-restraint, do not over eat at iftari!
Financial appraisal:
Just as we give our zakat, which is charity in proper proportion to our assets and wealth, we need to focus on other issues too. Lots of financial things need to be sorted out. Specially, we girls and women have to pull up our socks. All laws are equal for men and women. We have to give our zakat and fitrana. In the same way keep our finances in check and control.
Girls, I love your donations, I found many of you have to ask your husbands to give your donation to me, as you do not have a PayPal or other account. Please have your own accounts. My sweety pies, you must stand on your own two pretty feet. It is important to handle your finances yourself.
I’m telling you from experience, though I did more than most girls, still I had trouble. I’d let my husband deal with so many things. Suddenly when he left, I had to manage. Now, I can handle it all but take my daughter’s help. I should get independent. So, let us learn to handle all our financial systems, and improve them.
It is very important. I cannot stress this enough.
Spiritual connection:
We maintain a dialog with our Maker five times a day. This is vital for our wellbeing. Why do we look up when we look for Allah? He is all around us. He is in every tree, flower, human face, animals, birds, all these are evidences of His presence. He is everywhere, especially in this mountain, the flowers on the bushes, and lakes!
Ask Him shamelessly. He is the Only One who can get you what you want. If anyone can, He can.
Oh, He didn’t answer your prayers?
Know that if He doesn’t, accept a prayer, then He certainly has a good reason for it. Just like as a parent, we do not give our children certain things that our child cries for, knowing it will harm him. That’s why, Allah doesn’t give us everything we want. Knowing it would harm us.
Accept His verdict, please!
Family connection in Ramzan:
Nothing beats performing religious rituals together. In my grandfather’s house there was a mosque. (In Gul-e-Gulsher, Pindi Gheb.) The whole family said congregational prayers there. There was also an azan – the prayer call- followed by the prayers, five times a day. It definitely left a mark on me. Similarly, I remember a prayer my husband and I said in F-9 Park, it was somehow so overwhelming. Then, of course, our Umras and tawaf round the Khana Kaaba.
So, during Ramzan, getting up so early around 2.30 am and having sehri or breakfast together is like the whole family rising for a mid-night feast. I remember, my mother as a Christian would keep these fasts with my father and myself. We all sat together and then after Fajar prayers we would sit and chat till dawn some times. These were some of the most profound family times. These are strong moments of family bondings, avoid letting the screens take over these times.
Do make these times profound and let beautiful moments happen. Just treasure them. How many of us know, how many of us will be there next Ramzan? (I remember, the last Ramzan my husband and I had, was truly beautiful.)
While making sehri for your family, please do not feel self-pity for yourself, the ‘poor little me!’ syndrome. Instead, say ‘how privileged I am for this!’ Do take all the help your family members offer. Do not criticize them for how they do it, or they won’t offer help next time. Give full recognition and appreciation for all help by the family. Try saying tahajjad before making the sehri.
Aitakaaf (solitary prayers and meditation for hours or days):
This is awesome, and even if you do it for a few hours. Also if any family member wants to do it, try to give time to yourself too. It is definitely a very rejuvenating experience, though I’ve only done it for a couple of hours, instead of the ten days. This is an important way to be connected with our Maker in this world too.
We have to pray for our community, our country and the world for a rapid freedom from Corona.
The world after CoronaVirus :
- More care of our earth. Air. Water. Earth. Resources of gas and petroleum! Enumerate how we can do it individually.
- Love and care for each other. Let us continue to greet each other by not touching each other in the future – leaving hugging and kissing for special occasions only- and eating in separate plates.
- Sitting or standing with a distance from each other, at home and in public places.
- More cleaning of everything: doors, floors, seats, clothes, utensils, cars’ interiors, handles of all doors everywhere.
- Wear masks and gloves when necessary, (especially while using office computers.)
- Have ‘2 work-from-home-days-a-week,’ in all schools and offices, (like our meatless days!)
- Use less materials, and own less things.
- Reduce trips to markets etc. by better planning.
- Less drives, plan to combine chores and do car-pooling.
- Stop overdoing things.
All your Ramzan questions are beautifully answered here:
Stay blessed and protected my wonderful Readers! 🙂