We are ‘Work in Progress’

*Nigar Nazar is always sparkling, bubbly and full of ideas about her next project. Love it.*

Hi Everyone!

You know something? Well, I didn’t know either! I never knew life in one’s early sixties could be so amazing. I’m actually feeling so happy. Alhamdolillah! Why didn’t anyone tell me? – it is because no one confessed their age! Even I’m breaking some rules while confessing now, but I believe we have to make our own times.

The moment someone knows your age, their attitude changes! They put you in a box in their minds. They start treating you like a ‘has been’. (No one likes that!)

Pakistani culture is ruthless – hence the lies. Know what? I’m not falling in with it. What I believe is this: Each of us is a ‘work in progress’, so we can mindfully change ourselves the way we want. By the way, asking anyone’s age is a taboo topic, yet when you do find out, look for the positive. (If you live long enough, you to will join the rest. In fact, it gives me great hope.)

You and I can change this perspective together. Because the way I see it, our own future is in our own hands. We both know, ours will be a new world.

New times now:

For me, being truthful is more important. That is the base of trust. It also defines the fact that one is authentic. Frankly, it is a beautiful time to be in this world.

Actually, in previous times too it was good; as the older, and wiser persons were honored and respected for all that they had achieved and contributed.

My advice to the seniors:

It is time for us to earn the respect we demand. We need to be more understanding and candid with our youth (we produced them!) Also, let us to work on ourselves. A lot can be improved within ourselves physically, emotionally, socially, intellectually and financially. So, lets keep going!

Advice and suggestions to juniors:

Please don’t be judgmental. Do not brush off the elders with sweeping remarks. They too, need your understanding.

They need your respect and realization that when you are their age, perhaps then you will understand why they did what they did. You will find yourself becoming like them. (Or, the opposite! – as the case may be.)

Warning:

I’ve seen one thing in life, if you hate someone strongly. You will end up becoming exactly like that person later on. Actually! I’ve seen this happen several times.

So, keep your hormones in check, and cool it.

Fresh times with fresh, new rules:

Neither age, nor the times are the same. It is how you perceive it, and how you plan to go about it. The fact is that today we are in a better world. We have so many great inventions in our hands. Health wise, and wealth wise, things are better now.

My parents actually can see the dust on things, and often check me regarding it! 🙂

Today, at eighty-six my mother’s eye-sight is better than it was at twelve years of age, when she needed glasses. Now she can read without glasses. It was the same with my father at ninety.

Science and medicine has improved the present and future for us. So, it is time we adjusted our perceptions and paradigms too.

The senior most posts:

Joe Biden, ready to become the next President of America, at seventy seven years of age.

Just look at Joe Biden, (we are not looking at Trump now!) and most heads of states, are in their sixties and seventies. Yes, my dear. Most of the wonderful business people and heads of institutions are all in ‘senior’ ages. Senior ages bring senior posts too. Provided you have what it takes.

So, if you are in your sixties and seventies now, your capabilities are that of senior posts. Take note of that.

Look at Jane Fonda in her eighties, still working, and still amazing. Among Pakistani stars you see Bushra Ansari at sixty-four who lately re-married, and Samina Ahmed (in her seventies?) who recently got married. Why not? It is a new beautiful world now, so we better change our outlook here. Let us bless others and get blessed too.

How will it be when you and I join them?

Self-management at all ages:

Jimmy Engineer the great artist, sharing his life experiences with a keen audience of Islamabad at my home.

So, basically it is all about self-management. It is about taking care of yourself and your loved ones. Standing on your own two feet and being positive. These things make all the difference, at every phase of life.

Pakistan and its culture needs to take a jump forward now and move fast to become one of the developed countries of the world. This is where it begins; by putting the senior, and younger people into its workforce. To make allowances and provisions for the seniors and juniors in their lives to make them active parts of the society.

A few tips for all ages and stages in life:

Mansoor Rahi and Hajra Mansoor are very health conscious, and lead active lives in the art scene.

Physically:

Exercise daily, control your diet and eat wisely. Sleep eight hours a day. Drink plenty of water. Use herbal and spiritual treatments before going to allopathic medications for any health issues.

Intellectually:

Learning new things is best way to keep the mind bright and connected. Use books and YouTube to learn. Employ someone to teach you something new. One good thing would be to learn how to improve your computer and mobile phone know-how and skills. Take control of what goes into your perceptions on a daily basis. Reading is an excellent habit. Remember to read about new concepts and inventions.

Stop living in the past, and tune yourself to the present.

Social and emotional:

These are combined because they are connected. Meet people from all strata of life. Be interested in them and work for, and with them.

Do social work whenever possible and regularly too.

Spiritual:

You have your own spiritual soul and presence. Be aware of it. Pray regularly in whatever religion you belong. Every religion teaches you to love others and be in harmony with the universe.

Financially:

If your finances aren’t in order, you can’t be in order. So, personally be involved in taking care of your funds. Make your money work for you, and not the other way around! There is nothing gender based here. You need to be financially independent. If you are not, then you have a lot of work to do. Get going!

Provide facilities at all levels:

When I fell in Sheikh Zayed Academy where I was working, in 2015 and got injured, yet went off for a holiday in Abu Dhabi, I found that travel on a wheelchair was so easy while being abroad.

Starting from PIA, which provided the wheelchair, and allotted a person for me at the airport (free of cost.) In the same way, there were ramps everywhere. The door handles are at a height for a person to use from a wheel chair. This is what is needed in Pakistan at every step. This is the biggest difference between a developed and underdeveloped country; providing for special people in their society.

You know in 2019 when I visited the Provincial House in Halifax, Canada; I was told by Peter that the Speaker of the House was a paraplegic, (a person who cannot use his arms or legs,) and for his sake, a lift was installed in the historic 200-year-old building, to facilitate the movement of the Speaker in the building!

This is how progressive societies work.

Changing mindsets urgently:

Everyone in Pakistan today wants it to become a progressive country. Yet, no one is ready to do his or her bit in the process (wanting someone else to do the dirty work!)

If the government is too busy yakking away, who is to stop you from making the difference? Why can’t you use your initiative when constructing your building (private or personal) with ramps wherever needed? When I built our house, we made a ramp in the front of our house to facilitate our elders. Now, we all only use the ramp. Also it is useful when rolling out our bags when going for a trip, or to bring in groceries etc.

Similarly, every market in Rawalpindi-Islamabad area needs ramps, so the elders can move easily. Why aren’t there proper ramps provided? This really infuriates me.

The people in society who look with pity at special persons, are the ones to blame for not making life better for them, in the society. They are themselves to blame!

Sigh. What I’m trying to say is:

Use technology and change mindsets immediately to make a better community today.

Take care at every stage of life:

Take care of yourself, at every age. Use your time wisely and carefully, and sky is the limit.

Meanwhile facilitate the people facing problems in life due to lack of facilities. Help people to become independent instead of pitying them or looking down at them.

We are all a work in progress and need to make life better for each other. Lets not judge each other, and mind our own businesses.